First of all, I would like to apologize for the lack of posts recently. I would like to update this blog as often as I can but sometimes things just don’t work out. But here I am, with another small update on my experience here in Germany.
It has been 250 days since 12.03.2017, which was the day that I left Malaysia for this exchange program, time sure does fly. I currently have less than 60 days left in Germany, 57 days to be exact. People tend to now ask me whether I’m excited to be going back to Malaysia soon, and honestly, I can’t really give a certain yes or no.
I really am excited to go back to Malaysia, to be able to go back into my “comfort zone”; to be able to once again be with my loved ones; to be able to go back to familiarity; to be able to smell the scent of Nasi Lemak and Durian in the air; to be able to lepak with my friends at the mamak, drinking some teh tarik kurang manis (which is still super sweet most of the time); to be able to understand everything the people around me say; to be able to finally go home.
But what truly is home? I now understand what the saying: ‘Home is where the heart is’ means. Even though I’m longing to go back to Malaysia, back to where I consider as my homeland, I have found a home here in Germany. As I look back at the 8 months that I’ve spent in Germany, I’ve realized how much I’ve gotten used to this place. It still intrigues me how I’ve actually integrated here in Germany.
When I first arrived in Germany, I was just a lonely, lost, hopeful Malaysian kid who didn’t know a single word of German except how to say ‘the sky is blue’, like that would help. But now I would consider myself as partially fluent because I can carry everyday conversations with little to no problems. After the first few months of living in Germany, I really wanted to go back to Malaysia, I really wanted to quit, I didn’t know what I was doing here, German was too difficult, the people don’t really care about me, and I felt more alone and foreign than I have ever felt in my life. But now I feel like I matter, I now have a family that cares for me and I can find comfort in them, I feel like I belong.
I really will miss Germany, every single part of it, whether the good or bad. All of these things I’ve experienced have brought me to where I currently am at, and I couldn’t be any happier with how far I’ve come. I will miss the people I’ve met her, I can now proudly say that I have friends from various parts of the world. I will miss the travelling that I’ve done more recently, and all the crazy things that I’ve done, like a spontaneous one-day-trip to Paris. (which I might write a post on in the future)
I’m really thankful to God and my parents for giving me this opportunity, to have thought that I could’ve missed out on this amazing experience is pretty unimaginable. I hope that you guys have enjoyed this post and that you all will have a great weekend ahead, God bless.